Summing it up – 2012


Mr. Bunny is still needed. Thank God.
Just yesterday I was marveling at how fast the last month or so seemed to gain momentum, particularly because of Maddie. Pacifier was retired. Diapers are suddenly only for long car trips and overnights now.
Other Big Moments this year: Teeth have been lost and grown back in. Zoey learned from to read from “The cat sat in the back” type of books to full-blown chapter books with ease. She went from fearful and gaspy in the water to confident and swimming on her own.
Maddie went from garbled nonsense baby babble to complete and coherent sentences all the time now. We started the year proud of identifying animals and shapes in a book, and now we get a full description, maybe a joke, and usually an opinion, too.
The girls developed a real friendship and bonded more this year than ever before. Zoey doesn’t see her as a baby any longer. They can sit and watch the same TV show together. They play ring-around-the-rosie, and paint sidewalk chalk together. They both sit and eat the same way at the table – no more high chair.
Oh, and we got a dog named Sonny. He’s been the most annoying, amazing addition we could ever hope for. He’s perfect for our family. He’s also really, really fun to photograph.
As for me? I started and failed a 365 (one photo a day) project. I lost track of days, got in a slump and ditched.
I got too busy with work, and that’s not a terrible problem to have.
I took a lot of photos, and a lot of naps, too.
I learned that I take a lot of photos of my front yard, my back table, my tub and the beach.
Reviewing this pile of images started to freak me out about too many BIG changes this year.
And just when I’m feeling like the Mayan Apocalypse version of childhood lost has happened in only one year, Zoey cried for her Mr. Bunny tonight.
In a slightly twisted way, I was relieved at her sobs. He got left behind at Abuela’s house last night. She sleeps over every Friday night, and he goes with her. This afternoon, he somehow got left behind.
When she couldn’t be consoled, she asked me to come lay with her. “Please, mommy… please lay with me. I need some good thoughts. I need you to help me sleep. I can’t stop thinking about him. I would do ANYthing to have him. I don’t need anything else for Christmas except my bunny back.”
Dramatic? Yes. Sincere, though.
So I did lay with her and we talked in whispers. She asked me to tell her something silly and I could hear her voice break off a bit. She’s learned this year to cope with stress by finding humor and that makes me hugely proud.
We came up with some inappropriate poopy jokes about Alfie the Elf and giggled. I stroked her hair and remembered she’s still 6, even though her front teeth are now the same ones she’ll have when she gets married someday.
Maddie snored in the background, sleeping in a bed instead of the crib we started the year in.
When she was calmed down, I kissed her goodnight, then came back here to the dark and bright of my monitor. My quiet nighttime refuge and aside from my own mind, the storage place of my memories.
I am so grateful for the photos. Always, always grateful for the photos.
P.S. My husband and I are rarely agreeable to having our photos taken. This should most definitely change for 2013.

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6 thoughts on “Summing it up – 2012

  1. i am seriously floored by you. you must leave laughter and joy in your wake, emily. and all the quirky, fresh, totally honest stuff that makes it. you have the most amazing eyes and heart and it is a total honor to know you, to take in your art. yes. art.

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